Bartender Jackpot: Blind Date - Part 2 of 4

So with Ann the beloved bartender of Brady's past gone, everyone was surprised to see Mitch walk in and take his usual spot at the bar last Friday night. The waitresses treated him like the prodigal son, hugging him, exchanging pleasantries, introducing him to me with a "You'll love her - she's awesome!", and pretty much falling all over themselves to welcome him back.

Jason, on the other hand, didn't give much of a reception at all. He was remembering the last exchange they had, when Mitch stormed out after swearing and cursing at Jason for firing Ann after a heated drama-filled incident that took place front and center at the bar. But, being the businessman he is, and realizing that the return of Mitch and others like him, would only mean lucrative things for his wallet. He saved his comments for much later in the night.

Mitch, he told the waitresses, was waiting for a date.

"A BLIND date?", they gushed? He responded it was indeed. I wondered how they knew it wasn't a second, third date, or even his girlfriend he was waiting for. And then I got to know Mitch throughout the night, and realized that blind dates were the only type of dates that Mitch got these days. He was just about as pompous as he was bald - about a 7 on a scale of 1 to 10.

And, he was somewhat of an exaggerator ("Yeah, I've been doing this really challenging 90-day workout, it's all about muscle confusion. I am almost done..." Ha! "Really" I replied - "Me too! P90X, right? I'm almost done too." And his blind date looked at me, looked at Mitch, and complimented me on how great I looked. Then she said to him, "HOW LONG have you been doing that same workout that she is?")

But these character traits showed themselves later in the evening. Right now it was 6:45 and he was just going to nurse a club soda until his date arrived -- and set the scene for either an alt. bev or drunken night. Guess which one it turned out to be, four and a half hours later as the lights were turned off all around them, and Mitch had taken possession of Jane's watch so she wouldn't know what time it was and therefore could not say she had to leave... Professional Blind Dater - yup.

When Jane arrives, he awkwardly gets up, reaches for the hand she extends to him, draws her in close to him, and instead KISSES her hello, practically on the lips. "Sorry," he explains, "I just feel like we had this connection..." She laughs nervously, takes her seat, and immediately orders a martini. I abandon all other orders to make this drink and get Jane drinking as soon as possible -- she's gonna need it.

So what connection did he mean? Just then as she walked in, and he realized that she was attractive, nicely dressed and expertly coiffed? Or did they spend late-night hours on the phone all week, leading up to this date? It must have been the former, I decide, because they are going into their lifestories, backstories, and silly little observations that one makes to another in an introductory conversation. And then I am even more skeeved out by his kissing her hello. Poor Mitch lets on how desperate he is way too soon in this marathon date.

Once he realizes that Jane plans on drinking her way through this date, he does the manly thing, and orders a glass of Pinot Grigio to join her. Nice impression, Mitch...


Next: Stomach Stapling, Wine Snobbery and Striking Out