The "I Didn't Know Any Better" Sprint Days

I have been suffering through my wireless contract for the past 16 years. After getting my first real job as an Investment Management Customer Service Rep at a large financial services institution, I walked around downtown Boston and into the first cell phone store I saw. Chance. That's how I found Sprint. And that first colored flip phone (if you know me at all, you know that I do not buy gray or black phones. From the very first one, if it was pink, or purple, or really anything but gray or black, I was going to buy it.)

I went through my share of colored phones, each time extending my harmless contract another two years. All providers were the same, as far as I knew. Besides, I lived and worked in a large metropolitan area, where coverage was fine (except for in the vault of my bank, and I only went there once or twice...). So status quo served me just fine.

Then we moved to the boonies. Well, as far as Sprint coverage was concerned we were in the Boonies. Daily, I would lose calls as I would travel across main streets, that oh, just happened to have trees on either side of them. That must be the reason, I told myself. I should drive on roads with no trees. And no telephone lines either. Ironic. I would just find "better ways" to get to my destinations.

And this is how things went for years and years. My just "putting up with" the fair, often "poor" service that this otherwise helpful company offered. At least I thought they were helpful, until I actually needed to visit one of the service centers for help. That adjective soon went out the window.

Whenever you visit one of these service centers, you are required to wait about 35 minutes before being helped. That allows you to hear everyone else's problems and realize that yours isn't so big after all. Dropped calls? That's nothing. This poor slob's ear electrocutes every time he answers a phonecall. Oh, and this guy -- he tried to cancel out of his contract, and now he has to come here every Monday morning and re-activate his phone. Just for thinking about leaving us. Yeah, ok. I can live with a few dropped calls. I am outta here...

And so I continued to deal with the sub-par. After all, I hadn't entered the age of texting, or Internet via cell phone. No, those perks were years away for any Sprint customers. Hard dial, phone connections, that's all I needed them for. But, wait -- I could get into texting..

Enter 2008. Sure, it was months, years even - after the other better-knowns had been providing these services. But I caught wind of them, and I wanted them for my own. Mistake #2. But I quietly acquiesce, being happy enough for what I get and when I do... Such a martyr, we all know.

So now I am struggling through spotty connections, texts that don't go through three-quarters of the time, and web service that gives me the exact same status updates it gave me three hours earlier. That's not possible! I change my own status every two. Hmmm.... sub-par Sprint was frustrating me again. And, cough, I might ACTUALLY call them on it. Let's see how this goes...

Sprint: I woudn't go back to their bar.

While the theme and focus of this blog has been thus far the trials, tribulations and debauchery at one particular bar, I am changing the focus for this next series of blogs. But am I really changing it that much? Is a bar all that different from any other place of business? Not really.

All places require a product or service to be sold; a customer to purchase that good or service; and a customer service representative to give that customer the service or good that they expect. I, the bartender am the customer service rep. And if I bartended at Brady's in the same ignorant, unapologetic manner that the Sprint customer service representatives deliver their products through their company, then I would be working at an empty bar, and probably not working at all.

This next group of blogs will explore the ways in which Sprint has completely abandoned the customer service principle, leaving in its wake a very large segment of unhappy customers, thirsty for the type of service and respect that any old bartender happily and automatically gives. And bartenders' products cost about 20 times less than Sprint's. And their customer's length of stay is on average, a couple of hours, versus the years that Sprint takes hold of us through their iron-clad contracts and subpar attention. So why is it, that I have repeat customers by choice, and Sprint can only keep customers because they give them no other choice..?? Read on, and let's investigate.

Threesome - Not, Part 2

Three bottles of wine later. (They were walking home to the same place. Though after the ridiculousness that Jessie pulled on Anna, two of the three girls were threatening to drive back to Boston. With THREE bottles of wine in them. Uh - oh. Time for the bartender to get creative...)



"Wait!" I say to Kara and Jessie as they are about to fall their way out the door. "You can't just leave XX and XX here together. He is clearly a slimebag, and she is going to need some best friend consoling later on when she realizes it too."



This made them hesitate. "Oh fine." Jessie looked at Kara, as if to get her approval for this gameplan change. "I suppose she didn't really MEAN it when she called me a whore in the first place."



"Right." I said. "She was just hurt. She thought this new guy was going to be different than her last few." Now I am just making stuff up, hoping to sound convincing, and a hell of a lot more coherent than those two. While I am pleading with them to tend to their hurt friend (okay, save my ass, as the bartender that arguablely could have overserved them...), Anna has emerged from the Ladies' Room, where she had been hiding for the past 10 minutes after storming away from the bar and calling Jessie a slew of very unflattering woman terms.



But it wasn't Jessie's fault. And really, it wasn't Anna's fault. And in all honesty, it wasn't really "Boyfriend Mark's" fault either. These kinds of complicated misunderstandings are par for the course when there are 3 people involved. And I am talking about any combination of 3. It could be 3 women. 3 men. 2 women and 1 man. 2 men an 1 woman. Though I doubt the two men would get as catty and hysterical when a woman is the object of their competing effection. Not outwardly so at least. Men seem to have the control and objectivity to stifle their inner tears in trade for a down-the-line, much-planned-out sabotage on their buddy. Women need to act now, and they need to act hard. I give us credit for this honesty.



So it doesn't really matter what Jessie "did" to Anna, and how Mark reacted to his "girlfriend." You've seen this same night played out a hundred different ways at a hundred different venues - restaurant bar, healthclub, commuter train, business dinner. The three thing just doesn't work out. Hopefully the women could see past this one night of trouble and put their friendships back together -- either with or without Mark. And, for the bartender's sake, that they all WALK home. Well, except for Mark. He can hail a cab for all we women cared...